So long, 2012. Hello 2013!

It has been a strange couple of weeks since my last post. We've had Christmas, for one. Normally this is a time for celebration and togetherness, but this year I've felt very un-together. My brothers both live in Southampton, but one doesn't drive so it's hard to get them over here at the same time when there is no public transport. We saw them on Christmas Eve but there is nothing that beats a proper Christmas Day celebration. I am always left with feelings of guilt; could I have collected them all and brought them to mum's, should I have put aside my own wishes for a family day at home to go over there? In the end though, I know I have to do what is right for us, so Scott, Flo and I had our Christmas morning sauna and brunch followed by present unwrapping and then roast duck for lunch. I was feeling pretty lousy already with a cold, but the sauna seemed to help.

In the evening we walked to mum's with all our presents (I live just a couple of miles from my mum, so we get to drink too!). We arrived to find a rather somber room full of people not watching the carol concert on the tele. My gran was in a foul (and still unexplained) mood, and my dad was doing his best to wind everyone up. Flo and Izzy, my niece, soon livened things up, but I was very conscious of a worsening cold. In hindsight we should probably have stayed at home to avoid spreading our bugs to the family, but I had to weigh up the guilt of not going and the guilt of sharing my cold. Neither option was particularly appealing.

After much gift sharing, food scoffing and whiskey Mack guzzling, we made our merry way home with flo asleep in her pushchair. We've since had a sickness bug which affected just Flo and my dad (who is never sick) and the cold has progressed to my lungs as well as to my grandparents (which is the LAST thing I would have wanted). So the days between Christmas and new year have been fraught with guilt. I had to go to work on the Thursday Friday and Saturday as I am not yet entitled to sick pay, so I dragged myself in each day.

Work definitely warrants a mention in this review of 2012. I began the year having worked yet another Christmas in retail at M&S and was determined to change things before another Christmas hit us, so I applied for all sorts of non-retail jobs, particularly accountancy and bookkeeping ones. I wasn't contacted by a single employer until I finally bit the bullet and applied to a banking group. I had never considered a career in banking having worked at Skandia in the past, but having sailed through the online selection process I found myself with the prospect of working for a bank! Not only were they happy to take me on part time, but they also impressed upon me the chance of progression, even at part time hours.

Just what I needed after a career in which I'd been under constant scrutiny, constantly questioning my own ability and dreading the next surprise inspection. Teaching was not a career I could return to without some serious adjustments to my self-confidence and my work-life balance. And so here I am, a customer adviser for one of the country's biggest banking groups, thoroughly enjoying my job, getting on well with my colleagues and feeling like I can genuinely help people with their financial problems.

For so many of my friends 2012 has been an atrocious year, and yet I find myself looking back and thinking, wow! That was awesome! We have had our share of bad years, and have been through all kinds of financial difficulties, but this year we really got our shit together. I have been doing Scott's accounts for a few years now, and feel a bit like Yoko Ono at times when I try to control the artistic side of what he does too, but anyone who has seen his work progress this year will understand just how talented he is and how very proud I am to call him my husband. He has been published in lots of magazines this year, and is even being paid by some of them. He has worked with some incredible models and performers, and is more in demand than we could ever have anticipated. Hopefully with my support he can continue to expand his portfolio of clients and we'll start to see some real returns for his time and talent. So yes, 2012 has been really good for us, but there is no reason that 2013 can't be even better. In fact, I intend to do everything in my power to see that it is!