Eggs-ellent opportunity for a treat (or two)

Easter.

Not my favourite holiday of the year - way too much temptation around for my liking. With payday just before, a long weekend and a toddler in the house, there is a natural inclination to over-indulge. I had planned to decorate our spare room so that Flo could have the bigger bedroom. This is great from a weightwatchers perspective, as it involves lots of activity. Plus, with Mr C on shoots from Friday to Tuesday, I knew I'd be decorating alone. This suits me fine, as I am the world's worst control freak. If I had to watch Scott put up wallpaper, for example, I know that I would tut, criticise and ultimately take over, so it's probably best that he keeps away.

Flo is a funny child. She loves vegetables, meat, fruit, etc, but is really not interested in chocolate or sweets. Having four Easter eggs in the house in peril of going mouldy at any moment is a real test of my willpower. I am fine while they are in boxes, but once the egg is unwrapped I willingly and whole-heatedly succumb. I will hereby confess to having eaten about 2/3 of a cadbury's egg (ridiculous number of points due to the increased sugar content of Easter egg chocolate).

Another diet-wrecker I associate with DIY is the takeaway. Most weeks we have a takeaway after weight watchers (like tonight) but on a DIY Weekend (like on a fight night in a Vegas casino ) this can double or treble. So yes, I ordered takeaway pizza Friday night. One positive is that I only ordered a medium each for Scott and myself (old me would have ordered a large) and I ate 2/3 of the pizza, leaving the rest for a cold lunch the next day. Oh, and the good people at Dominos saved me a few calories by omitting the chicken, leaving me with a pepper, sweet chilli and mushroom pizza. Yum. Ish.

I guess what I'm really trying to say here is that I really deserved to put on weight this week. Oh, and did I mention mum's bank holiday Monday tea, with sandwiches, pizza, quiche, cake and nibbles. So, it is with a large amount of shock, glee and, dare I say, guilt, that I have lost another 1.5lbs. I know, ridiculous, eh?

So far my weightloss now stands at 34.5lb, nearly 2 and a half stone! I weighed in this evening at 12st 3.5lb. I served one of my former teaching assistants at work today, and she remarked at how much weight I've lost. I still can't really see it, but I enjoy the comments at least :)

That's it for another week. Thanks all! Night night!

Two stones lighter!

It's official! I have now lost two whole stone! Yes, now I am at 12st 10.5lb. I still have another stone or so to lose, but bloody hell, I'm proud of myself! I've been back to making healthy soups, which are a life saver on cold days. Flo even asked to take some to nanny's this week for her lunch, so they must taste good too!

Center Parcs last week could have been disastrous for my weight as there are lots of lovely places to eat and drink. Somehow with all the walking, swimming and spa time I managed to stay motivated enough to make healthier choices. One evening I even shared a pudding with my husband (trust me, this is not something the old me would have contemplated; it would have been more of a "are you finished with that?" before swiping a half-finished pud from him after already finishing my own).

Shopping news now, and this week sees the purchase of a pair of size 14 jeggings from M&S. think leggings crossed with jeans. I went for the tougher, standard fly-fastening sort rather than the tempting but potentially problematic elasticated waist ones. I worry that I would happily munch my way through a Henry VIII size banquet in my too-comfortable waistband and not realise that I had put on the whole two stone in the course of one meal! Lol! So fixed waistbands are a must.

I've also been more adventurous with my footwear, and have been seen teetering about on some rather gorgeous 4" heels with my skinny jeans. Can I just use that word again? Skinny. Ooh, I love it! I know I'm not even close to being skinny, but the fact that an item of clothing which had heretofore been a definite no-no in my clothing repertoire is now not only accessible, but actually pretty comfy too, is flipping brilliant.

In true Jeanie style, I am of course going to celebrate my milestone with a yummy curry. We have kept takeaways as part of our diet because I don't want to live feeling I can't enjoy something naughty occasionally, and certainly don't want to reach my goal weight, eat a curry and put on half a stone. That is not going to be me. In the meantime, I'm off to put on my elasticated trousers for an evening of gluttony, DVDs and perhaps a teensy glass of vino.

Back on track

Sometimes I feel like this diet is too good to be true. I ate out with Scott and Flo at the weekend (Bella Italian, yum!) plus we had a takeaway last week. I've had bolognese, roast pork, fresh garlic bread and more, and yet somehow I've lost all the weight I had put on over Christmas plus an extra pound, taking my total WW loss to 24.5lb and my unofficial loss to 27lb, just a pound shy of two stone!

I think my motivation levels are particularly high at the moment as I have bought new clothes with my Christmas money, and received some new clothes for Christmas too - all with a size 14 label. The jeans I bought shortly before Christmas are actually starting to get rather baggy already, so perhaps a size 12 isn't a million miles off?!?

I still don't see any difference when I look in the mirror, either facially or in my body shape, and yet I know I am smaller. I have no idea why this should be, though. I just notice my eyes when I look in the mirror, and my smile. After all, those are the only things that matter - window to the soul and all that jazz.

We are going to Center Parcs soon, and I am really looking forward to going swimming without feeling like a blimp, as I am fully two dress sizes than the last time I was there, and hopefully will be two stones lighter too.

Scott and I are also heading to the House of Burlesque show in Portsmouth in February, for a mixture of business and pleasure, so I'm hoping to wear my size 14 steel-boned corset for the first time ever. I've managed the 18 (whilst pregnant) and the 16 (whilst breast feeding, lol!) but have never quite managed to get into the smaller one. Just need to decide what to wear it over/under/with etc. Exciting stuff :)

Ooh, ah, just a little bit, ooh, ah, a little bit more!

Ok, so tonight was the big post-Christmas weigh-in. A moment of trepidation and downright terror for many of us. Of course there are always people who manage to hold it together at this time of year, but many more of us who, frankly, let it all go. I kind of sit in between these two positions. I fill up on veg still, but I'm not about to deny myself the treats associated with the season, in particular the cheese. Oh my, the cheese...

Disturbing my reverie briefly, I refer now to my blog post's title. I don't usually quote Gina G, but her lyric seemed most fitting. For me. And cheese. Oh my, the cheese...

My main issue at this time of year is the extra-lateness. Normally I go to bed between 11.30 and 12.30. When I don't need to be up early, and more to the point, when Scott doesn't have to be up early and isn't on a shoot, I'll happily stay up past 2. Not a major problem, until you remember that dinner is usually around 7, and the extra few hours means we get the late night munchies. Munchies and wine. I forgot to mention the wine...

Anyhow, to cut a long story short, I fully expected a hefty weight gain on the scales tonight, having weighed at the end of last week at nearly half a stone heavier than my last weigh-in. Clearly that shock to my system helped to focus me. My weight has gone up by 2.5lb, taking me back to 13st 0.5lb. I'm going to set my new target for this quarter to get to 12stone. With a holiday at the end of this month, this may yet be a struggle, but that is my goal. Thank you for sharing my journey so far, and here's to a little bit more of being a little bit less.

A review at the end of the year.

So here it is, the final weigh in of 2012.

2012 was a year in which I saw myself gradually eat my way into a size 18-20 in clothes, fairly unnoticeably. Yes, my clothes were no longer fitting, yes buttons were popping open on tops and blouses, and yes, a colleague kindly pointed out (in my previous job) that I needed to go up a size. The thing is, I didn't FEEL any different - that's the trouble with gradual weight gain - you don't realise the tiny changes that are building up.

In July I went on holiday to Cornwall - one of my favourite places, and somewhere I've always felt comfortable. I had a great time, don't get me wrong. It's just... the photos... When Scott uploaded the photos there were so many of me looking really solid around the middle, making me look OLD and just not looking like me. You'll notice that the photos I've tended to put up are of me from the shoulders up.

Goodwood in September was another time when I saw photos and thought, "I don't want to be like that anymore"... By this point I had already begun my weightwatchers journey, so I knew I was headed in the right direction, but any kind of "goal" seemed a long way off.

At the weekend, Scott, Flo and I went to London for the day - a very rare family day away from home. We did a few touristy bits (Natural History Museum, Hamleys, Carnaby Street) and took Flo on the underground for the first time (well, the second, but she was too tiny to remember the first). it was great to have the time out. I wore heeled boots all day, carried bags and toddlers and had lots of photos taken, and, wait for it, I FELT GREAT! I was wearing my slimmer size 14 jeans, my size 14 coat, and felt like I deserved to wear them. (You know how sometimes you can sneak into a smaller size due to the brand being over-generous, the stretch being more than adequate, or the cut being slightly irregular, but never actually feel like that's your size...)

The day after London I was poorly, but I recovered within 48 hours to be back full of energy and enthusiasm. My eating habits have changed, so my energy levels have improved, and my overall fitness is on the up. Walking is about all the exercise I'm doing at the moment, but I'll be cycling in the spring, so perhaps 2013 will be even better. Work is going great, Flo is flourishing at preschool, and Scott's photography business is coming on in leaps and bounds. Oh, and I lost another pound this week, taking me to 12st12lb - a total weight loss of 1st 12lb. Nearly 2stone!!!

Merry Christmas everyone!  See you on the other side!

No longer a baker's dozen!

It has been a week of "being good" food-wise. I've had the odd chocolate, the odd *cough* Toby Carvery, a teeny tiny takeaway and, oh yeah, a complete Finnish Christmas dinner! For the uninitiated, a Finnish Christmas dinner is a joy to behold, and a joy to consume - we had Christmas ham, herrings, smoked salmon, potato bake, swede bake, carrot bake, red cabbage, *covers Flo's ears* reindeer, mushroom pie, mushroom salad, beetroot and apple salad and COPIOUS amounts of red wine.

Throughout my time with Weightwatchers I've not felt like I was on a diet. I've cut down on the alcohol, stopped buying daily chocolate bars, stopped sitting with a bowl of kettle chips whilst watching a film, and just thought a little more about the choices I make on an hour-to-hour, day-to-day basis. I don't feel deprived, I don't stand out like a sore thumb when eating with friends and family (ie I don't have a huge plate of salad when I eat out) and I still keep losing weight. It really goes to show how just a few small changes can make all the difference.

Would I like to sit eating a big bar of Dairy Milk? Yes! Would I enjoy it at the time? Undoubtedly! Would I beat myself up afterwards for wasting a week's worth of bonus points on a moment of idiocy? Damn right! I know I can have a small amount of chocolate, enjoy it, and then carry on with my day guilt-free. Feeling guilty about food is so unhealthy, as you inevitably start to either resent the diet, resent the forbidden food, or worse, resent the people around you who are, perhaps unwittingly, tempting you to eat. Nobody forces me to eat chocolate, crisps or KFC - I choose to. I know I can balance my diet by easing off in other areas. That's just how it works for me.

So, here's the great bit of news for this week - I've lost 2.5lb this week, which brings my weight down to 12st 13lb - yes, that's right! I'm under 13stone! This was my goal by Christmas, so I feel I've really achieved something this week. My total weightloss is now 25lb (in-meeting is 22.5lb) which is the most I've ever lost with Weightwatchers. Before I got married I lost 21lb but that took me down to 10st 2lb and a size 12. This time I'm thinking I ought to aim for 11.5-12st which would be a loss of around 3stone.

Another really positive note for the week - I've bumped into a few people I know who I've not seen for a while, and they've noticed a change in me. For some it's purely a size thing, but others have noticed a greater vitality, and more of the "old" Jeanie back. This is a combination of the weight loss and my new job, both of which are giving me the confidence to face the world with a smile.

Once again, thank you all for your support and encouragement. Hopefully will have some photos for you soon x

You've got to... Accen...tuate the positive...

I'll get the negative out of the way straight off - I've put on half a pound this week (shock horror!) but I am totally putting it down to the fact that I wore jeans and hi-top trainers instead of my usual workwear to the weigh-in.

Ok. so, that aside, here are some awesome positives that are making me smile immensely this week:

• I bought myself my first pair of size 14 jeans since the year I got married (2000)
• The jeans fit me comfortably
• One of my friends at M&S (where I used to work) commented that the jeans I was wearing (my supposedly skinny size 16s) were too baggy on the bum and I needed some smaller ones (thank you Kait!) 
• I've had a good start to my working week
• Scott is being published in no less than 4 separate magazines this month
• Flo has been given her part in the preschool nativity, as a camel (rather than Mary, as she had told us!) 

So really, I can't grumble. I've had a really ordinary week food-wise. I've not even attempted to make a soup (definitely need to, as the carrot one I made last week is just not nice - too sweet). I've had a sneaky KFC with Flo, eaten out with the family, had more than a couple of evening drinks, plus more than two roast potatoes at the weekend. I've even eaten some Christmas chocolate. If that equates to putting on half a pound, I can definitely live with that.

Only two more weigh-ins before Christmas... Can I get to the elusive 13 stone mark? I'm certain I can, and I'll let you know next week how I get on. For now, though, I'm off to wrap some Chrimbo presents.

It's the final countdown! (diddle-ee-dee, diddle ee dee deee)

As the title suggests, we are in the final countdown of the year, so yes this post is about the run-up to Christmas, but sung in a very cheesy American karaoke voice with optional (compulsory?) air guitar...

Last week I did not blog. "Boo hiss!" I hear you cry... Well, I was feeling pretty let down (by myself) as I put on a pound last week. A well-earned pound, but a pound all the same. I knew it before getting on the scales, and short of turning up to Weightwatchers in a bikini and flip flops, nothing was going to tell the scales otherwise. And yes, before you ask, I HAD shaved my legs and cut my toenails - all to no avail! So no, I didn't blog, and yes, I did feel guilty about it all week.

Failure at the scales did not affect my mood, however, and I had a stonkingly good week at work, hit the shops at the weekend (being paid does make that a better experience!) and did still more Christmas shopping yesterday. I've even started wrapping (yes, wrapping) in November - ME! I've bought lovely crafty bits for Flo and I to make - going for full-on Kirsty Allsop status this year. I bought real meat from a real butchers, and have been eating sensibly, even going for the jacket potato with tuna yesterday rather than the all day breakfast (which was definitely calling to me with its cholesterol-laden voice).

You will, then, forgive me for being rather smug tonight. As not only did I lose the pound I'd put on last week, but an extra 2lb into the bargain, taking my weight to 13st 1lb. I'm nearly there!!! I've officially lost 10% of my body weight based on my WW start weight, which is an official 20.5lb. With the extra 2.5lb I lost between first getting on mum's scales and my first weigh-in, that's 23lb. One and a half stone (and a bit)!!! Tonight I received my 10% keyring at the meeting, and it made me feel even more motivated to keep this going.

Did I mention going shopping? Ooh, yes... shopping when you're losing weight - herein lies the problem. Do you buy clothes as you lose weight (because everything's getting a bit baggy and shapeless) or do you wait it out, see if you can drop another dress size? I'm split on this. I bought a size 16 coat early on in the autumn, and it was a snug but not tight fit. Seeing my reflection whilst wearing it the other day I felt (and looked) older than I am. Much older. Scott reckons it would be better if I put the fake fur hood trim back on, but the shapeless nature of the coat will never make me feel anything other than frumpy in it. Yesterday I found the solution - a gorgeous navy blue (work colour!) fitted hip-length duffle coat with furry hood trim and twiddly toggles. I loved it immediately, bought it as an early Christmas present to myself, and have since shown anyone who'll listen (and many who won't) that it is a size 14! Yippeeeeeeeeeee!

Definitely one of my smuggest blogs yet, but, hell, I think I deserve it! *smug face*

Yet again, thanks for the awesome support, the encouraging comments, and the recipe requests - it makes this process seem even easier knowing you're all behind me :D

Not feeling 100%

I'm not feeling 100% today. D'ya wanna know why? Do ya? It's because I've lost 10% of my body weight, so I'm now only 90% of the old me!!!! Wahoooooooooooooo!

Can you tell I'm pleased? I've now lost a stone and a half, and losing 10% of your bodyweight if you're obese (as I am) gives many health benefits, for example reduced cholesterol, improved blood pressure, less chance of having type 2 diabetes and more. I lost 1.5lb this week, taking me to 13st 3lb. 13st by Christmas doesn't look too difficult now... maybe even by the first week of December!

I didn't look at my BMI (Body Mass Index) when I started, but have calculated it now. When I started the WW plan 72 days ago my BMI was 34.2, so I was well and truly in the OBESE category. Now my BMI is 30.7, so I am edging closer to being just "overweight".

I'm going to put my success this week down to eating the sort of food that I love in quantities I never would have been content with. Many of you who are friends with me on Facebook will have read POTATOGATE. For those of you who are not, here it is... "Dinner tonight was roast chicken, roast potatoes, cauliflower and carrots. Due to my weight watching, I went for masses of veg, one chicken breast and just one, very crisp, perfectly formed roast potato. This is my treat, you see. I don't resent this, it's how I choose to make my diet work for me. What I DO resent is saving my ONE potato till near the end of the meal, at which point a certain small person looks longingly at the potato, then lovingly at me to say, "Mummy, can I have just one more potato? Please?" before swiping said potato off my plate with her fork."

I can easily give up roast potatoes in the sort of quantities I used to eat - easily 6-8 potatoes with my roast - but to lose my only potato right at the end of my meal did make me irrationally upset. I made a chocolate and ginger cheesecake at the weekend to eat with friends after dinner (my friend Steve cooked a wonderful chicken casserole with buttery mash and greens). I had a small slice (and may actually calculate the entire recipe in terms of points if I ever make it again) and loved the indulgence of it, the naughtiness of it, and the fact I had 4 days to reign it all back in again in time for my weigh-in. That for me is key - I can indulge, as long as I then get back on track.

My other way of coping with "the diet" is by making soups. I am currently working my way through a batch of zero point vegetable soup - ingredients below. One of my colleagues at work commented today that the soup smelled of "farts". Lovely! And I won't deny, there are some breezy side-effects associated with eating so many vegetables... but if I eat a lovely tasty soup with zero points for lunch, I can then eat a normal dinner with my family, side effects or no. 

Once again, I thank you all for your comments, messages and support. Only a few more weeks until Christmas, so maybe I'll get a photoshoot with my lovely man then... 

Warming cabbage soup
Half a white cabbage, shredded
One butternut squash, diced
3 large carrots, diced
1 yellow pepper, diced
1 tin of chopped tomatoes
1 onion
1tsp oil
1 tablespoon of flour
1 chicken stock cube in 3 pints of water
Paprika
Coriander (ground and leaf)
Black pepper

Fry onion in oil. Remove from heat, then stir in flour. Add stock gradually, stirring to make a roux sauce (but without the milk). When all the stock is combined, return to the heat, add vegetables and stir until you reach boiling point, then leave to simmer until all vegetables are soft. Add spices to taste (I used about 1tsp of paprika, 1/2 tsp of each type of coriander and a good pinch of black pepper. Keep tasting until you're happy with it. Nutmeg works well with this soup - just use what you have.

Eating out, Eating in, Eating Everywhere!

Ok, hands up who noticed I didn't blog last week? Or were you (like me) too busy thinking of the poor little mites dressed in skimpy little Halloween costumes, dishing out sweeties to the ones who braved the cold snap and rain and then polishing off the leftovers... not that I did that... much...

I have to admit, I love the autumn - it's a time of year where it's acceptable to dress from head-to-toe in snuggly knitwear, to spend time indoors baking, and to eat delicious hearty soups. Put another way, it's a time when you are more likely to catch a glimpse in a shop window or store mirror whilst wearing said knitwear, plus a huge coat, scarf and hat, and think, "My word, I look big!" It pays to remember that underneath all those layers there is a very different shape, and that everyone else (if they're sensible) is equally wrapped-up and couldn't care less how lumpy you feel. The baking thing, though, can get dangerous. I've found myself baking more biscuits (which I have to eat whilst warm, of course) and this week I've made a huge batch of chutney. Not eating it all is a challenge, so I'm giving things away - it's the cooking I enjoy, not the extra weight when I eat it.

I've had a few "challenging" days in the past fortnight. Days in which, had I let myself, I could have EASILY eaten a full week's worth of points in one meal.

My colleagues and I went out for a Chinese meal last week, all paid for by the company. This in itself is risky - you mean, I can eat what I like and don't have to pay? *Claps hands in delight!* I will at this point admit that the starter platters were very tempting, but my appetite is thankfully less than it once was, and I stuck with the non-battered dishes (mostly) and far fewer items overall. When the crispy duck with Hoi Sin and pancakes came round I asked if I could have hot and sour soup. Not a problem. And boy, was I relieved this evening when I asked my WW leader about my choice - duck pancakes work out at 9points each, and you can easily eat 3 or 4. Hot and sour soup - 4points! Winner!

A good friend of ours came round for a curry just two days after the Chinese meal, and I'm afraid I just had my usual curry, rice, popadoms and naan bread... so I really deserved to put on weight - surely? Well, considering the Chinese was taken up by one week's bonus points, and the Indian meal used the following week's bonus points, I just ate sensibly the rest of the week, bulking up on veg and fruit, keeping alcohol to a minimum and just taking it easy.

Imagine my surprise (and joy!) to find this week that I've lost another 3lbs. This takes my total weight loss to 19.5lb - 1st 5.5lb (official WW loss is 17lb - 1st 3lb). Not bad for 9 weeks. At this rate I should get to my 13st target by Christmas - only 5 more weigh-ins to go and only 4.5lb to lose!

Right, that'll do for now - thanks for the support everyone, and fellow Weight Watchers - hang in there!

Finger lickin' good! (or bad?)

After last week's telling off at Weight Watchers I could easily have gone either way - I could have become the militant, hardcore Weight Watcher, always with a 1point snack at the ready should temptation come my way, constantly munching on fruit and turning my nose up at the slightest whiff of vino or, dare I say it, cake... or I could become the "hang-it-all, I'm quitting" type, having a major binge whilst blowing raspberries and sticking my fingers up at my tracker...

Not me! I focused on making lovely home-made soups, bulking up on vegetables and choosing leaner cuts of meat and fish. My salmon and vegetable soup last week saw me through a couple of work lunches, then I opted for freshly-made sandwiches with simple fillings from the convenience store up the road.

At the weekend I took Flo to Southampton. This, in itself, is not a major event, granted, but it could have turned into a foodfest easily! The thing with it being just the two of us for a change, is that there is less pressure (perceived or otherwise) to eat crap. We walked from our home to the ferry (about a mile), took the little train up the pier, then the ferry across the water to Town Quay, where we picked up a free bus to take us to West Quay. Perfect! In true "ladies that lunch" style, we went to Marks and Spencer for a pot of tea and a babycino. We had no cake as we had eaten lunch before we left (Strike one to Jeanie!). After a bit of window shopping and picking up a few basics, we went to Asda and chose a quick snack - cooked chicken skewers (only 1 point per 2 skewers) and some fruit, then headed home. So no MacDonalds, no Pizza Hut, and no oh-so-sneaky Fat Jackets (they sound as though they should be healthy, but you really don't want to know!).

That's half of the week done, easy peasy! Throw into the equation a family birthday party on Sunday, though, and you can start to panic... it's days like Sunday that I'm glad I don't dip into my bonus points on a regular basis. I had a biscuit (that I'd made, I might add), some nachos, dips, chilli with rice, CHOCOLATE CAKE and other nibbles. This I could probably get away with on any good week. This week, though, I took my parents home after the party, around 6.30-7pm, driving past a MacDonalds and KFC. When I say driving past, I actually mean, driving into and ordering an eat-in family bucket with extra crispy strips. My part in this calamity cost me 20 points. Maybe 25 with the popcorn chicken of doom I accidentally "helped" Flo with.

Monday I did a big weekly shop, stocking up on fresh fruit and veg. This makes my life SO much easier from a diet perspective, as most fruit and veg are "free" on WW, so I tend to fill 3/4 of my plate with veg, with small amounts of meat and potato. Sounds dull, but I love veg, and I don't feel at all deprived.

Enough of that! I shouldn't polish my halo TOO much - I've been less than angelic food-wise. Tell that to the scales, though, because today I weighed in 3.5lb LESS than last week! This takes my overall weight loss to 1st 2.5lb, and my WW weight loss to 1stone exactly. I reckon I can lose another half stone at least by Christmas, so here is my pledge - to weigh 12stone-something by my final weigh-in on 19th December. I know I can do it, with or with out Colonel Sanders!

Yet again, thank you all so much for the support - I love your comments after my posts :D

Blame Toby

I think I got off lightly this week - I was fully expecting Katie at WW to say "You've put on two pounds!" so was very relieved to have stayed the same. Here's why...

First: I didn't track. This is one of the fundamentals of Weight Watchers - you have to track. Keeping tabs on the food you've eaten during the day not only allows you to reward yourself on low-point days but also means you have an accurate idea of how many "bonus" points you can use if you happen to go out for a meal.

Second: I baked biscuits. I'm usually pretty good with this, as I can restrict myself to one or two. I took half of them to my mum's as my brother, sister-in-law and niece were all there for the afternoon. Of course I had to try a couple more while I was there. What I didn't need was the extra 4 or 5 when I got home. For that I look to my next issue...

Third: Scott was away most of the weekend. Being the wife of a very successful and busy photographer has its perks, don't get me wrong (I can get as wrinkly as a prune and he magically smooths away the lines on any photos of me in Photoshop!) but one thing I find difficult is the amount of time he's away from home, particularly at weekends. I usually end up either not making much of a meal for myself, concentrating on Flo, or I say "stuff it!" and eat like a pig. It's daft really, as it is SO counter-productive, but I can't tell myself that at the time.

Fourth: I went out for the day with mum and nan. This is always a positive thing - I get to spend some quality time on a four-generation day out. What makes it slightly awkward is the fact that occasionally we want to celebrate, and this week nan was adamant that we would celebrate my new job by stuffing ourselves silly at the Toby Carvery at Christchurch. In and of itself this wouldn't really have been a problem, as I restricted my potatoes to three, and went for turkey rather than beef and positively HEAPED my plate with veg. What really did it for me was the afternoon tea at Stewart's garden centre - a sharing plate of sandwiches, scones, fairy cakes and shortbread. It's one of those "too good to miss" type deals, and I think for all of us it cost around £10. I didn't need it though, and I should have said to mum and nan to just get themselves a cream tea and I'd have some fruit salad. The fact that I didn't is purely my fault. I'd still like to blame Toby though.

Fifth: I haven't been shopping since last week. I'm out of my favourite fruits, I've got very little in the stock cupboard, and I'm all out of home-made soup. Unfortunately, until I get paid at the end of the week, this situation is not going to change. Having to wait an extra ten days after my usual payday is actually fairly crippling financially. 

At my WW group this evening, only a few women had lost weight. Many had stayed the same, and some had put on. This led to quite an interesting discussion on our lack of self-control. One woman suggested that over-eating actually IS a form of control - we CHOOSE to eat more, whether we feel worthless in ourselves, or, worse, to SPITE someone else. I feel both apply to me this week. I am perfectly capable of saying no to food, it's just that this week I chose not to. I said I'd be honest and open in this blog, so there you are. I haven't failed, but I'm not impressed with myself. Next week will be better. Scott is away all weekend again, but I'm going to try and keep busy and make sure the fruit bowl is full of tasty treats. The cap of resolve is firmly in place - woe betide any who try to knock it off!

It's ok to be naughty, as long as you track it!

Some weeks I can walk into my Weight Watchers meeting feeling virtuous, knowing I've "behaved" and avoided over-indulging. This is NOT that kind of week. I walked into the meeting feeling anything BUT virtuous. I have to blame my best friend Kirsty for this. Yes, that's right, I'm taking no part in this where blame is concerned. Here's why:

Eleven days ago I baked delicious chocolate biscuits. 16 of them to be precise. These were 3 points each, so I was careful and limited myself to a couple. However, on the way to visit Kirsty ten days ago I felt that my chocolate biscuits might not be entirely to the liking of our little monkeys, so I picked up a tube of Cadbury chunks and a BIG tube of Smarties (you know, the Christmas ones). We had a lovely time, ate lunch, ate a few biscuits and then looked at the sweets. Kirsty was dubious about keeping both tubes, so I opted to take the Smarties home with me. Flo LOVES Smarties, right?

WRONG!

On the revelation that Flo doesn't like Smarties I steadfastly decided that I could resist them. Unfortunately I put them on a shelf right above the coffee machine, right in my line of sight all day. I managed to ignore the tube for a week, but then the weekend hit. Scott was on shoots all day Sunday so I was a bit down, and sought solace in the little pellets of loveliness. In handfuls. Till they were gone. Granted, this ended up spread over 3 days, but still, a lot of points for not a lot of point, if you see my point. I tracked the tube, using my bonus points, and resolved to be extra good for the rest of the week.

So yes, I blame Kirsty. I love you really, Kirsty, but never ever let me take chocolate home with me.

To make up for my chocolate dalliance, I decided to make a huge vat of soup - always good for a bowl of soup, me. I'd picked up a side of salmon from the bargain shelf in Tesco, so I went for salmon and vegetable.  I made enough for 14 individual portions (only used a tiny bit of salmon though - cut the rest up for other meals). Last time I made soup I thought it would be a good idea to batch up two bowls at a time in takeaway tubs, because in my head I always sit to eat a meal with Mr C. Sadly we don't always eat together, particularly at lunchtime, which is traditionally my soup time. Needless to say, my last soup was in double quantities, with me eating two portions for 5points rather than one portion for 2 points. I would not make this mistake again. My salmon soup I portioned into little Ikea freezer bags (the press-seal ones) using 4 ladles per bag. Each portion - 1 point :D

Ok, so a little bit of penance, a little bit of making amends... but still had to walk into Weight Watchers feeling as though there was evidence of my Smartie-related wrong-doing all over my face.  Incredibly I managed to lose a further 1.5lb this week, proving that it's OK to be naughty, as long as you track it!

So, overall weight loss is now 13.5lb (WW official weightloss is 10.5lb). I weigh 13st 11lb, so I'm getting there, slowly. I think I'd like to aim for 13 stone by Christmas. I'm sure I can do it - 1lb a week consistently from now on should just about get me there. My leader asked me about my blog at the meeting this week, so if any of my lovely Marchwood ladies read this, please say hello on the comments. Thank you for reading xxx

New job, new dress size, new goals!

It would appear I had a rather good end to September/start to October. Last Friday I completed my final shift as a bra fitter and this week I've been training for my new job. It's strange. Over the years I've had many different jobs, and have left for all sorts of different reasons - end of contract, move to permanent role elsewhere, to go and do something "worthwhile", to have a baby etc. This time was different again.

Working in retail is fairly straight-forward. I'll never say it's easy, as you're on your feet most of the day, face to face with the public who often have a very set (and perhaps not terribly accurate) idea of the sort of person they are going to be served by, all the while smiling, staying positive and making the best of what you do. It is not a job I disliked by any means, but it was certainly not fulfilling all that I seek from a career.

The key objective for me in leaving was to move into a business where working part-time hours doesn't automatically put you on the back foot. Banking seems to match this objective really well. I'm not allowed to say where I work (some of you may know already), as we've been told emphatically that we cannot publicise this in case someone uses the information to make us commit fraud, or to blackmail or bribe us. Sounds pretty drastic, but I can see their point. Anyway, suffice to say, I now work for one of the UK's leading financial institutions, and will be seeking to progress from a cashier to an adviser as soon as I am qualified. Because I can progress. The phrase used in my interview was "part-time hours, full-time mentality".

So this week, training has well and truly begun. I'm working Mon-Fri for the first time in 3 years, which has been a culture shock to say the least! Granted, I've not had to travel too far, as my training is in Southampton, whereas my fellow trainees have traveled from South Cornwall, South Wales, West Sussex and Hertfordshire. Unfortunately temptations are many when you are training, particularly with a chap delivering sandwiches, crisps, hot food, chocolate and other tasty treats every lunchtime. I've averted diet disaster by taking in a flask of hot soup, purchasing a salad, and today taking in more soup, this time for microwaving in the training department.

So, what is the outcome of this tumultuous week in terms of my Weight Watchers diet? A loss of 2.5lb, taking my total loss to 11.5lb and my official WW lost to 9lb. I also wore my size 16 smart trousers today for the first time this year (couldn't do them up before!) so I'm definitely heading in the right direction. My current weight stands at 13st 12.5lb. My 5% goal is 13st 12lb, so I'm now looking at my new goal of 13st 3lb, which would be a 10% drop from my start weight of 14st 10.5. Not bad, eh?

I'm feeling pretty good about how quickly this is happening. I'm not hungry, I don't feel deprived, as I'm still eating occasional chocolate and snacks, and tonight I've had one of my favourite meals as a real (high in points!) treat - home made lasagne with garlic bread. Yum! So, onwards and upwards (or downwards might be more apt!). Thanks once again for all the support. I love to hear that you've read my blog, and even more when you comment. It really means a lot and makes the whole journey much easier.

Big changes in the Chalmers household

Ok, so I'll get to the point straight away today - I lost 1/2lb... I'm a bit dejected about this, but I'm realising this shouldn't feel like a failure in any way - it's still a loss, and I had an exceptional week last week. It takes my total loss to 9lb and my official Weight Watchers loss to 6.5lb. I'll try to explain why this may not have been such a great week in terms of weight loss...

Firstly, Scott and I have rediscovered fajitas. These seemingly innocent little wraps filled with spicy goodness are sneaky little buggers! The wraps alone are 5pts each (unless you buy the tiny WW ones for 3pts) and I always have 2 (before it would have been 3 easily!). I used lots of peppers, onions and mushrooms plus a small amount of chicken (I kept this separate so Scott could lean his towards chicken and I could lean mine towards veggies). Add a dollop of sour cream for 1pt and some salsa and it's not difficult to have a 20 point meal - 2/3 of the points for the day. And we did this two days in a row!

We also ate out Saturday, having a notoriously dangerous Chinese buffet for lunch. I tried to stick with the vegetarian options or the non-battered meat, but the sauces are very high in fat and sugar, so to be honest, I probably used most of my bonus points for the week in that one meal :(

So,  all things considered, I did well to lose at all really - I didn't deserve to! lol!

On a more personal, non-weight-loss related matter, there are some Big changes in the Chalmers household from next week - this Friday is my final shift at Marks and Spencer, so no more bra fitting for me (and no more slightly-too-tight uniform either, for that matter!). On Monday I start working for the Halifax, and will be embarking on two weeks of training full-time. The job itself starts on 17th October, and I will be working Weds-Sat each week. I start work at 8.45 now, so will be sending Flo off to nursery two mornings a week, along with her regular one-day preschool session. She gets breakfast, a snack and a cooked lunch each day there, and will then be with my mum for the afternoons, prior to my collecting her after work.

This new working pattern also means that I will be home for family dinner time and Flo's bedtime EVERY DAY for the first time in two years! The effect this should have on both our diet and our sleep patterns I can only guess at, but I am definitely looking forward to being a mummy in the evenings again. My Mum heard for herself the sort of things people think about working mums sending their children to nursery this week, and I actually feel that the way I'm working things now will be better for Flo, better for mum and better for Scott and I as a couple. Scott will no longer need to schedule his photoshoots around my shifts, as I'll be home before him every day. Hell, we might even have some time to ourselves in the evening occasionally!

It really feels like the right time for me to be making such a drastic change. I'm very grateful for the support from my colleagues and friends in getting to where I am today, and look to the future with an eager sense of trepidation and excitement.